Friday, January 25, 2013

No God To Save Me

I've never cried so much before
Or felt such a consuming pain
My soul never felt so empty
A fire burning through my veins.
At times I couldn't breath
Sometimes I wished I didn't
No one deserves this feeling
But, every day I seem to live it.
What have I done so bad?!
To have this thing take over me
Live with love in my heart?
Is that really that awful? Honestly?!!!
I can't help but feel anger!!
And become frustrated with myself.
It is my fault I am found here
Can't really blame anyone else.
My thoughts stop making sense
The walls can't be any louder
My sanity is breaking.
The darkness taking all my power.
I wipe my tears but they keep falling
My voice is gone from all the crying.
No one around, don't need to hold it
I've lost this time, my cards are folded.
I try to sit up but this force keeps me down.
I try to scream but there's no sound.
I hold my chest to stop the "bleeding"
To find my heart no longer beating!
I'm scared, confused, this can't possibly be.
The hurt in my heart must have finally killed me.
Somehow I get up, maybe from all the terror.
And there's my reflection in front of the mirror.
I guess I'm alive but I don't believe it.
As long as I carry this with me this isn't living....


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